Doing Your Breast At Work.
Libs, you'll love this.
My cousin recently had a baby. A baby she decided to breast feed. For at least 6 months. Which, as you can probably guess, meant she was going to have to use a breast pump and, eventually, pump at work.
While some may view this as tantamount to a few cigarette breaks per day, I think we can both agree that running to a place where you can pump privately, assembling the pump in record time, turning the crank up to high speed to maximize milk-to-time ratio while also, conveniently, maximizing breast damage, is not as relaxing as, say, a nicotine fix.
So, after her planned six months, she stopped. And then texted me with this:
Dear Breast Pump,
Thank you for your continued service over the past 5 months.
Please return the skin from my nipples at your earliest convenience.
Best,
J
I'm still laughing.
No recipe post today, ma chere. Just a shout out to all of us who are doing the best we can for our kids, even if it means rough calloused nipples.